20 May, 2021
Sex Positions For Every Occasion
Sex Positions For Every Occasion
Lifestyle, Valentine's Day

The Best Sex Positions For Every Occasion

20 May, 2021
Sex Positions For Every Occasion

Trying out different sex positions is a great way to spice up your usual bedroom routine!

The art of getting better in bed is to be creative, stay curious and not just stick to the same old tried-and-tested routine every time. Furniture can be your friend when it comes to spicing up your sex life. Kitchen sinks, countertops, walls and mirrors can breathe new life into an old position. You can even buy custom-built sex furniture (made with comfy, easy-to-clean materials), to make certain positions more accessible and pleasurable. And if you’ve always wanted to try bona fide sexual acrobatics, then a sex swing will enable you to defy gravity without breaking a sweat. Or throw a sex toy into the mix. Something like a roll of bondage tape or a hands-free couples vibrator will take your sex position to the next level.

Read more: How To Make Initiating Sex A Fun & Playful Experience

What’s the best sex position to…maximise female pleasure?

Let me start with a statistic that might surprise you. Only 25% of women are consistently orgasmic from vaginal intercourse alone. So it makes sense to kick things off with an oral sex position, because women are much more likely to experience orgasm from a talented tongue on their clitoris than through penetration.

Try this upgrade from the standard, spread-eagled oral sex position. Have your lover position themselves perpendicular to your hip, so their tongue is going side to side across your clitoral hood, as opposed to up and down in more of a “head on” front-facing position. This is called the The Kivin Method, which claims to produce a faster and more intense orgasm for women.

Now let’s talk intercourse positions. To maximise female pleasure, I’ve found it’s usually the simplest positions with a couple of tweaks that work best. The Modified Missionary where you draw your knees up towards your chest or bring your legs up to wrap around your lover’s waist will elevate the pubic bone more than traditional Missionary, making it easier to get that clitoral stimulation.

Sex Positions: Praying Mantis

Think about incorporating more of a grinding action, as opposed to just thrusting, to ensure more direct contact with the clitoris. For deeper penetration and G-spot stimulation, lift one leg and rest it on your thrusting partner’s shoulder. The other leg can be placed around your lover’s thigh, like you would for standard Missionary. This is called the Praying Mantis position. It’s easy for your partner to also lend a “helping hand” to stimulate your clitoris in this position too.

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What’s the best sex position to…drive my partner wild?

If you know what body part really drives your partner wild, then choose sex positions that visually accentuate those parts. If you have a “butt person” in the bedroom with you, then try the Reverse Cowgirl, a position which puts the woman on top, but facing towards her lover’s feet. Or experiment with Bent Over Doggy-style, also known as the Turtle position. Start off on all fours in the traditional table-top position, then bend your head and shoulders to rest them on the bed, while keeping your bum in the air. You can wrap your arms around your legs to help lean further forward and provide balance.

If it’s breasts your lover goes crazy for, then something like a classic Woman On Top where you can lean over to allow your breasts to drop oh-so-sensually into your partner’s mouth works well. For added intensity in these positions, make sure other erogenous zones on the body get attention too. If there’s hair that needs grabbing, ears that need nibbling or nipples that need sucking, you know what to do. Or let your primal side take over, and wrestle, bite or claw your way to a screaming climax in any position.

Read more: Why Can’t I Have An Orgasm?

What’s the best sex position to…feel close and intimate?

Sex Positions: Spooning

If you’re feeling frisky in the morning, Spooning – a position in which both you and your partner are laying down on your side facing the same direction – is a great way to start your day for hetero, same-sex and gender-nonconforming couples. It can also be modified with endless variations based on your preferences. Whether you’re after some gentle clitoral stimulation or a little backdoor action, this position has you covered.

For slow, sensual, energetic lovemaking and intimacy, The Lotus position (also known as Yab-Yum from the Tantric tradition), is my go-to. Have your lover sit with crossed legs on the bed, with you sitting on top of their lap. Usually it makes most sense for the lighter partner to sit on the heavier partner’s lap, and wrap their legs and arms around the other person in a passionate embrace.

This is a great position for kissing and looking deep into each other’s eyes. Some couples even join their foreheads together to connect their “third eyes” and share sexual energy, appreciating each other’s presence to the fullest. As you have sex in the Yab-Yum position, try to breathe deeply together and see if you can synchronise a few breaths, while grinding and rocking your way back and forth to ecstatic bliss.

Read more: Here’s How Tantra Can Revolutionise Your Sex Life

We all have unique strengths, flexibilities, shapes and sizes, and we all fit together differently. So the sex positions mentioned above won’t work for everyone. Instead, use them as a guide, play with them, modify them, and create your own versions. Then you can name them as enigmatically as you want!

Illustrations by Katia Soldatova for Sassy Hong Kong.

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